All parents work hard. Single motherhood can be especially taxing. Single moms have a unique journey, though.
As one myself, I know that to be true. While there is actually a lot I love about parenting on my own, the downside is that when times of celebration roll around, such as Mother’s Day, there isn’t another person in your life to celebrate with or to encourage your kids to celebrate with you.
The good news for me is that my kids are getting older and more thoughtful. But over the past few years on Mother’s Day, I’ve had to find small ways to celebrate myself and my motherhood journey.
The truth is, as single moms we should celebrate ourselves because we deserve to acknowledge all the hard work we do day in and day out. Whether or not there is another co-parent in the picture, we still do so much. When we’re on duty, there is no other parent to help out, and that means we don’t have a lot of downtime or time for ourselves.
Here are some important and meaningful ways we can celebrate Mother’s Day this year.
Write down what you love about motherhood.
It’s easier to reflect on things sometimes when you write them down. There is so much that is challenging about single motherhood, it’s great to take some time to think about what you’re grateful for, too. For me, I love the unique bonds I have with each of my kids. It can be hard to see it sometimes when I’m caught up in the day-to-day, but when I really think about what we share together, it feels really great to know what we mean to each other.
Buy something that makes your life easier.
Whether it’s an amazing coffee pot that makes you feel a little posh or a vacuum that will clean your house with the push of a button, splurge on whatever it is. As single moms, we don’t have another parent around to help us do the dirty work — like cleaning the kitchen or doing the laundry. And while we might not have a big budget for everything we want, snagging household items that lighten our load a bit can feel so good.
Reflect on what makes you a special parent.
There are many parts of parenting that I struggle with. I can be impatient like no other, for example. But there’s also a lot that I bring to the table. For single moms, sometimes we’re up against big challenges that make our parenting journeys harder. That’s why it’s important to reflect on the things we’re doing well — like connecting with our kids. It’s also great to remember that just by doing what we do every day, we’re showing our kids that we are strong and capable and leading by example. And there aren’t a lot of role models better than single moms who are killing it.
Find a way to relax.
Single moms don’t have a lot of opportunities to relax. But on Mother’s Day, we should make the attempt. Whether it’s putting the kids in front of their favorite movie and hopping in the bath or asking them to head outside for an hour so you can have the house to yourself, you’re worth it.
Take a little time for you whenever you can get it. The only catch is that you can’t feel guilty doing it.
Connect with other single moms.
It’s so important for moms to have a community of friends. But when it comes to single moms, we need others who understand our unique journey. I feel so lucky to have a few single moms in my life who are important to me. This year on Mother’s Day, I plan to reach out to them to brighten their days. They lift me up on the regular, and doing the same for them always feels good and meaningful.
Invest in yourself.
Whether it’s a vacation you’ve been planning or a special class you want to enroll in to further your career, use Mother’s Day as an excuse to go for it. The truth is, we don’t get endless days, months, and years to accomplish the things we really want to do. We have to be fierce and go after what we want — single moms have to be more motivated than just about anyone.
Investing in yourself is just about the best gift you can give yourself. If you really want to make Mother’s Day matter this year, take whatever has been on your brain and put it into action.