Mom Shares Photo Of Dirty Dishes Piled Up In Sink And Writes Tribute To All The ‘Hot Mess’ Mamas

by Ileana Paules-Bronet
Ileana is the Editor of Original Content at LittleThings. She grew up in upstate New York and Oregon and now lives in Queens, NY. Ileana graduated from Skidmore College with a degree in sociology. After graduating, she attended the Columbia Publishing Course in New York City, then worked as in marketing at Oxford University Press. Since transitioning to editorial, she has written for sites like BuzzFeed, HuffPost, and Unwritten. She has also worked for local newspapers and magazines in upstate New York. In her free time, you can find Ileana watching Law and Order: SVU, eating ice cream, and spending time with her dog.

Almost everyone has had a day where they feel like, well, a hot mess.

Do you know what a hot mess is? According to, this is, “a person or thing that is a mess, as in being disorganized, confused, or untidy, yet remains attractive or appealing: He’s a hot mess when he wakes up in the morning!

Most moms feel like this at least once a day. After all, being a parent is ridiculously hard.

Danielle Silverstein and Farrah Maliavksy run the Facebook page, “Where The Eff Is My Handbook.” Danielle recently wrote a tribute to all the mamas out there who feel like they don’t have it all together.

In regards to the post, Danielle told LittleThings, “I hope it will help moms out there realize that we don’t need to do it all to be awesome mamas. We are fabulous and doing the hardest job there is. We need to be more forgiving and gentler on ourselves.”

Read below to see what Danielle wrote!

Photos: Facebook 1, 2 / Where The Eff Is My Handbook

[H/T: ScaryMommy]

facebook post

Danielle wrote:

Ok, full disclosure: I really AM a hot-mess mom.

I am consistently five steps behind where I should be in the world of responsible adulting. Like, for real.

mom mug

Never once have I thought to myself, “OMG, I think I’m actually tackling this whole parenthood thing.”

Nope. Not once. Do I think I’m a good mom? Yeah, I really do. But I don’t have it all together by any stretch of the imagination. And that’s ok, I’m realizing.

danielle nope

I’m not so sure having it together and being a good mom are even synonymous. I don’t think it’s any reflection on, well, anything, in my opinion.

So, I’m coming forward to say it to everyone…I’m a hot mess. And I kinda just want to embrace it and move on, cause I have more important issues on which to dwell.

sink dishes

I am that mom who doesn’t do dishes at night before I go to bed. I do dishes when I get around to doing dishes.

I’m that mom who grabs her kids’ clothes out of the dryer in the morning because nothing is folded and put away.

danielle dishes

I’m that mom who forgets to send in forms and gets calls reminding me that, yes, I need to send in those forms.

I’m that mom who misses a birthday party or an appointment from time to time because I forgot to put it in my calendar.

danielle selfie

I’m that mom who forgets to RSVP and gets a last minute text asking if my kid is coming to the party.

I’m that mom who screams all morning to get the kids out of the house because we are all running late.

kid tv

I’m that mom who packs a crazy, one-food-group lunch because I haven’t gotten around to going food shopping.

I’m that mom who lets her kids have endless screen time sometimes (ok, more than sometimes) just because I don’t feel like fighting and need to get a few things done.

I’m that mom who has piles upon piles upon piles in the house of papers, books, and projects to go through that I say every day I’ll take care of but never do.

I’m also that mom whose kids are safe.
I’m also that mom whose kids are, for the most part, happy.

kitchen wine

I’m also that mom whose home has lots of love and laughter.
I’m also that mom who cheers on her kids and is their biggest fan.
I’m also that mom who is constantly working to show her kids they are accepted no matter what.
I’m also that mom who takes her kids to do cool stuff and have great experiences.
I’m also that mom who loves being a mom.

moms ice cream

I’m definitely a hot-mess mom, but dammit, I’m still pretty fabulous.


Please SHARE this article if you agree with what Danielle had to say!